Friday 31 January 2014


It's been along time coming but I feel I'm finally reaching a place of understanding about love that I haven't fully grasped ....until now.

We all know there are lots of what seem like cliches about loving yourself ; surely these were written by people who have come to the realisation of their own self worth and then want others to have the same experience.

This understanding has been slowly brewing, fermenting and it's the answer to so much of how love and life work. It's an enormous realisation that if you don't love yourself ( feel worthy) then you can't let anybody else love you either. If you can't let anybody else love you, life will always be harder than it should be.

You may live with the most loving person in the world but unless you can come to believing in your own indelible, deep rooted value and beauty you wont be able to allow love in.

You are like parched land that can't absorb rain.

Sometimes we attempt to love someone by giving them all we've got, time, money etc etc but unless you really love yourself, even your giving is tainted. It's born out of a need to please, a need for approval, to try and fill up that hole of unworthiness. Giving in this way often leads to over giving and can result in resentment.

Until you actually love yourself and this is not the same as confidence which can relate to things such as career and possessions you will always feel that you are not enough. You must realise deep within, that you are worthy, loveable, a piece of creation as beautiful and perfect as a flower, a tree or a dog.

I'm not quite sure how you come to this realisation but finding things to appreciate about yourself is a start.
Finding reasons to love whatever is in your surroundings is another. Every time you find reasons to appreciate you are adding a bit of love to yourself. Eventually softening the hard clay that has refused to soak up the love that is all around. We have to be able to soak up the love that is everywhere and by finding reasons to love we make that slowly possible. Eventually it will be the next logical step to realise if a dog or a cat can let you love them, never questioning their worthiness surely we can too.

By constantly practicing kindness toward ourselves, realising we are enough, we may eventually begin to feel an opening of the heart to self. Knowing...I'm okay, in fact I'm better than okay I'm really, really good. I AM
loveable. In this state I no longer feel the need to judge others, to find reasons to complain. I am happy and loving and know myself to be loveable and very much loved. I am now in the best place possible to live my truth. Love IS the answer. Love is all ......but it has to begin with self love.

PS With this understanding has also come a great empathy for those whose lives have been filled with pain because they couldn't love themselves. This answers a whole lot of other questions, but I'll save that for another day. Thanks for reading.

I can't believe it's July

Dream 1.3 x .6m

I can't believe it's July!

It happens every year when you realise half the months available in a year have already been and gone.
When you stop and think about all the events that have passed during that time, you then realise why it went so quickly. It often takes me a couple of months into the year to feel that the year is underway and this year has just taken a little longer than usual. I think it's quite amazing that I actually manage to create as much as I do considering the diversions I seem to get myself caught up in.. I know I'm not any different from anyone else and everyone has commitments of one sort or another and I'm sure that there are plenty of people who manage to be very productive amidst a schedule that is much busier than mine.

In the words of John Lennon "Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans".
At the moment I have no plans and this is a rare and luxurious situation for me. I feel pleased to
have very little in my diary. I have no holidays booked, no exhibitions scheduled just a long slab of time which I intend to spend immersed in my world of books and painting. Staying put and working feels
like a dream.

I'm also enjoying the opportunity to appreciate the paintings I've done in the last twelve months and the magical way that they seem to have found their way to new homes. I have more space in my studio than
I've had for a long time which is wonderful.

So in optimistic anticipation of the canvases I am about to start painting I will leave you with a few paintings from a body of work I created about this time last year. I painted these as therapy for myself after my mum died last June and it seems that they resonated with lots of people. The text is like gentle self talk urging me to feel my feelings and then to find my way back into the world. The world beyond water onto land  where life continues to keep evolving, in what seems complete ignorance of the upheaval of losing someone close. And perhaps that's just as it should be, we are gently (or not so gently) nudged back into the hustle and bustle. Another day, another week, another month, another year and so it goes.

Thanks for taking an interest in my work and I look forward to sharing what comes next.

 

Interview with Artsicle.

http://www.artsicle.com/blog/tracey-levett  

 

I was fortunate to do an interview with Artsicle the gallery that represent me in New York. I thought you might enjoy an insight into how I create my paintings.

 

 

A lot can happen in eighteen months.

                                     


By now anyone that's been following my blog may have given up on me, seeing as it's been eighteen months since my last post. The reason in part is because it's been a roller coaster ride of highs and lows. Now that the dust has settled I feel I can write about this time with some perspective.

In May 2012 I realised the dream of having an exhibition in New York. It was so exciting to watch that dream manifest from an idea to a fully fledged  experience. It was fun to remind myself whilst I was there "This is it!!! I'm in New York, my paintings are hanging on the walls of The Australian Consulate"
So many things had to come together for that exhibition to take place and so much of it seemed to unfold with ease. I had family and friends around me, a romantic sprawling old loft to stay in, people who helped and supported us and even  David Rankin to open the show. His insight into the paintings bringing a wonderful validation to my work.


There were many surreal experiences, one magical moment happened the day before opening night.  I had just finished hanging the
paintings  and feeling tired but happy headed out onto 42nd street towards Grand Central Station. As I made my way down the crowded footpath or should I say sidewalk I reminded myself to walk slowly, to savour this never to be again moment in time.

In my reverie I stepped into the subway smiling to myself,   I had a secret, I had achieved a dream. Whether or not I sold my work  seemed irrelevant, I was in New York  with my paintings.  As I walked, the sound of  a  haunting violin gave me goosebumps. The busker a young woman playing Ave Maria brought me to tears, it was sublime. Minutes later and deeper inside the subway I was moved by the joyful sound of a band playing a Van Morrison song, I started laughing at the synchronicity of it all. I was having a moment, one that will stay with me forever.

 Aside from the many wonderful experiences the trip was made extra special because I had my family with me.  We rented a large creaky old loft in Tribeca that had once been the Steinway piano factory. With it's 56 stairs from the street to front door we knew we were staying in a real loft. We loved it's wonky walls, exposed pipes and noisy location. For a few weeks it was our home. We felt privileged to be part of the rhythm of Manhattan, shopping at the local foodstores and bakery and loving the madness of it all.

About a month after I returned home my mother died. I was very fortunate to be with her during her last weeks, days and hours.  My mother had battled ill health for a long time and had had very little quality of life. I was sad but I felt she was at peace. 

Despite the difficult circumstances of her life, (going into a nursing home at 63) she was cheerful, she loved her family and fought until her last breath. My mother's passing nine months after my younger sisters sudden death gave me much to think about. They both seemed to have such difficult lives. Mum in physical pain my sister in emotional pain.

I felt so sad that I hadn't been able to change their circumstances. I wanted so much more for both of them. It was a situation that had been a part of my life for many years.  I had to make my peace with and it wasn't easy. It wasn't easy to realise their lives could have been so different if only they had known their own power. It's one of life's most difficult lessons, to realise we can't always make things the way we want them to be for people we love.

It's hard to keep our thoughts where we want them. They seem to gravitate to what is most familiar, a sad old story that for some reason we feel the need to keep telling. One that eventually becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
In order to let go of an identity that no longer serves us we have to tell a new story. To train ourselves to put our attention on what IS working, using whatever we can find to focus on that makes us feel a little better. In order to create a new story we need to be disciplined and pull ourselves up when we are tempted to complain. Sometimes when we are feeling upset about something distraction is a great technique.

I wanted both my sister and my mother's lives to be easier and less painful but we can't change anyone else's experience however much we wish we could.  We are all creating our own experience one thought or word at a time. Although that's hard to hear it's also exciting and empowering to know we are the masters of our own destiny. One thought at a time in any direction we want.

Your individuality is your gift to the world - preparing for 2012

 

Here are a few thoughts I penned this morning and perhaps, as we are on the threshhold of a new year it's
a good time to ask ourselves a couple of questions.

If you are not being your authentic self, then who are you being?

If you're not living up to your own standadrds then who's standards are they?

Whether it's putting flowers in a vase or driving your car every thing you do is a unique expression of who you are. When you compromise your own values you water down what you create and who you are. If you stay true to your own values and present possibly a less palatable version of yourself to the world, you also give others permission to be their authentic self.

Putting what's important to you first, also allows others to do the same. There comes a point in life where if we don't respond to the urgent calling of our inner voice ( which may have been gently urging us for years even decades) then we may miss the boat. Of course there will be other boats but not this boat. Some chances only present themselves once and it's up to us to decide whether to sail into unknown seas with the possibility of adventure and perhaps danger or whether to sit in our safe harbour in a boat that may be slowly rotting.

Growth is always daunting but it is also what makes us feel alive. When it comes down to it, we are either
growing or withering. Admittedly there is a time for everything ( including standing still).

Perhaps 2012 is the year to allow you, to be completely yourself and to live with abandon ( as opposed to fear). Some people say they don't even know what it is that they want. Start by doing small things that make you happy and watch them grow, before you know it by simply pleasing yourself you will be living an authentic life and in doing so contributing to the Universe.

 There is only one YOU. No one else can be YOU!

Follow your Bliss and may 2012 be filled with joy, expansion and unconditional love.



Tracey Levett Art: Body of Light & Passion

Tracey Levett Art: Body of Light & Passion

www.traceylevettart.com

Body of Light & Passion

Body of Light

21st October 2011

When I began creating the paintings for this exhibition my original theme was Passion. Using a dramatic palette of creams, reds and black I began. As I allowed the Muse and the paint to have their way, it seemed, much to my disappointment a different idea was emerging. Passion was nowhere to be seen, instead, the idea of body and spirit, physical and non-physical kept presenting itself.


The paintings looked to me, like mists of non-physical punctuated by these little clay bodies with a pulse of red life force. The physical sat in the non-physical with no separation. I changed my theme and decided to honour what was emerging rather than force the theme I was hoping to paint.


Then in September as I was getting close to having a completed body of work my younger sister Mary died suddenly. The experience led me to ask myself many questions and also to test the mettle of my beliefs. After much soul searching I have been left with a deeper appreciation of life. It gave me a jolt and reminded me that to be luke warm about life is lazy. Like relationships or vocations or any pursuit, to thrive we need passion.  It appears my theme has come full circle. The temporariness of the body is great incentive to
live with passion. By approaching even the mundane with more energy than is required transforms the ordinary into the extraordinary. A physical experience into something more.

 It appears that,  in a life well lived, we extract as much juice as possiblefrom our days.
 Life is our gift from the Universe - and passion, our gift in return.

"The Choosing" 2.1 x 1.2m

We choose what comes to us, by the thoughts we think.

Choose thoughts of Love.

"Meditation"  75 x 100cm

In the flow of Source's Abundance,

Love Joy Beauty Grace & Freedom.

River Dreaming 2.4m x 40cm

Dare to dream, this is where you create your reality.



Eternal  1 x 1m

Slow down, there will always be a new horizon.